Just for Me

In response to my last post, I loved Kate's words about writing "to clarify me and because it feels good." So, as my wonderful weekend rolls to a close, here are some of the moments that i want to hang on to (or clarify) for ME!

Things to remember:

• Wearing my heart covered rain boots always makes me feel better.
• Catching up with an old friend who is also a joy-filled young dad is a great way to start a Friday.
  
• Having lunch with a friend is wonderful food for the soul.
• Quiet time can lead to amazing inspiration for new creative works (more details later).
• Soul collage is good, hard work.
• The veil really is thinner this time of year.
• Cafe Campagne provides a little taste of Paris right here in Seattle.
• Kathleen Norris is a regular person. She sometimes doesn't journal for weeks and has been known to resort to watching "America's Next Top Model" for respite.
• Soltura sisters are the best family outside of family!
• My beautiful boy celebrated 8 months of hard earned sobriety this weekend.
• Having an amazing live-in photographer has its perks!
  
• Blogging buddies come to the rescue when you need them most.
  
• God is good.

One thing I would like to forget about this weekend, but probably won't:

• The wrath of a 16 year old daughter who says our home is hell on earth. We have the worst family ever. She detests living here. We are boring, have no passion and respond like robots. (I guess, there goes my nomination for mother of the year. Sigh.)
  

So, there you have it. Hmmmm. Glad I wrote the gratitudes first or that last one could really take its toll. Nevertheless, I may need to sleep in my happy boots!!!

Thanks for reading and I hope you had a delicious weekend and a great start for the week ahead. Peace.

If you are wondering about the photos, you'll have to forgive my sense of humor. After leaving Kathleen Norris' delightful spiritual & inspirational talk at the Seattle Art Museum (SAM), we noticed that we were right across the street from "The Lusty Lady" and that the SAM sign was missing one of its lights. Teehee. I couldn't resist!!!!

I. I. I.

"You find reasons to procrastinate, since to not work is to not make mistakes."

--from Art & Fear

Yesterday, I sat in my pajamas for several hours. I pondered the lack of response by readers at this space. I listened to the rain. I ate Halloween candy. I tried to nap. I read a little. I decided to give up writing...I. I. I.

"We have met the enemy and he is us." --Pogo

I have met the enemy and she is I! Think I'll get dressed today and go walk in the rain ☺.

wage love

Saturday night I had the privilege of attending Sabbath dinner at a friend’s house. He is a man who has struggled with his anger and not being able to connect with others in a loving way. The focus of the evening was to put away politics, the market, and other worries that keep us from finding delight in who we are. We began the evening with the lighting of candles and listening to a beautiful song by Kate Wolf called “Give Yourself to Love.” We then broke bread and shared wine in an act of communion as we began the shared meal.

The purpose of this post was not to write the details of this Sabbath evening, but to recall several moments that I have encountered during the last few days. Our host shared with us a picture of him at less than one year of age. He was being held in the arms of a loving aunt. As he shared this photo, he recalled that her arms had been a place of safety, trust and love for him while growing up in a household devoid of affection. As he spoke, my own mind turned to my beloved kindergarten teacher and I could feel her warm embrace and my own sense of safety and love when I was wrapped in her enveloping bosom. Being in her arms was a beautiful and pure experience of unconditional love—much as I imagine my host received from his aunt.

Yesterday, I listened to another story from a woman of a different culture. She is one of several daughters in a family that values boys most highly. She had been raised to believe that she was nothing. She spoke of many years of emotional abuse--first at the hands of her parents and then for 30 years with a self-centered husband. Somewhere deep inside this woman, however, there was a spark that kept her alive and reaching for the love she knows is available, but does not believe she has yet found.

All of these stories led me to wonder about what it is that keeps us searching for love. What are the moments that give us hope in the midst of chaos and hurt? What is the impact of a simple hug or cradling in the arms? What is the power that lets us know love exists?

The woman of this story believes she is searching for God’s love. She knows it is there. She believes it to be true. She wants to believe it in human form so that she can believe it to be true of God. Again I wonder…can the two be separated? Is that not what being incarnational means? Jesus was God incarnate. Is it not our greatest mission in life to love God and love our neighbors as ourselves? Do we not share incarnational love when we give ourselves unconditionally to another?

So, that’s what is on my mind this morning. Yesterday, Abbey of the Arts offered a beautiful post called, Wage Peace. My challenge to you (& me) today is to Wage Love. You never know when you might be someone’s spark that keeps the hope of love and life alive.

“Give yourself to love if love is what you’re after.
Open up your heart to tears and laughter.” --Kate Wolf

photos from st. severin church & musee d'orsay -- paris 2.08

hope

A dear blogging Canadian friend captured my heart this morning with her post which I have audaciously copied verbatim. It is one that I would love every voter to see and take to heart (regardless of party or candidate affiliation!) Please get out and vote if you have not already!!!

[photo by Callie Shell]

Hope is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but rather the certainty that something makes sense regardless of how it turns out.

-- Vaclav Havel

a thinning veil

this weekend has been one of both beautiful and still celebration as well as deep sadness and grief. sometimes i wonder how i put one foot in front of the other and other times the joy grips me and i am overcome with delight.

one of this weekend's blessings came in the form of this picture of my mother. it was sent to me by my sister and to my knowledge i had never seen it before. there is something about the photograph and the caption that my sister wrote, "she just wants to be a little girl," that has brought me a sense of peace and connection with my mother that i have not felt for quite some time.

mother died almost 5 years ago and mentally left several before as her mind was taken over by the dreaded alzheimer's. this weekend as i have spent time near my little altar, it has felt like the veil between 'here and there' has indeed been thin. something about this weekend reminded me of these words from richard rohr's daily devotion:

"surrender is something that is done to us.

you can't pick ahead of time which dragon you'll slay. the opportunity always sneaks up on you, and then all you can do is be ready."

am i ready? who knows? i think that is all i can share for now. it may or may not make sense to you readers. i am not totally sure it makes sense to me, but i do know that i wanted and needed to further mark this honoring of ancestors and the beginning of a new year.

there may be more later...or not. wishing you peace.