Scrambling for the Safety Zone

“We spend all our energy and waste our lives trying to re-create zones of safety which are always falling apart.” Pema Chodron

Scrambling for the safety zone. Is that what my mind is doing these days? Scrambling. Scrambled. I scramble. The challenge to quiet my spinning thoughts rises. So I pick up pen and notepad while Aslan, my ever-present muse, scrambles and scurries—actually he saunters—to take his place between my chest and journal. His nose tucks beneath my left arm as he snuggles into position. Is this his meditation time or mine? Who is teaching who?

How will I share my passion with the world? The morning’s question sends me scrambling for the safety zone of assurance. What’s next? How many sales? (Let that go.) Will people like it – receive it – buy it? (It doesn’t matter.) Will they relate – be moved – touched? (Maybe. Maybe not.) I’ve put it out there. Now what? My mind scrambles to fill the space. Write here. Schedule there. Do this. Don’t do that. Just BE... comes the overarching message. Stop scrambling! Breathe. Release. BE.

Where do you find yourself scrambling for a safety zone today? Is it working or would it feel better to breathe, release and simply Be?

As I Lay Pondering: daily invitations to live a transformed life by Kayce S. Hughlett. Available here and at Amazon.com.

Pondering... 30 in 30 - Day 24

"In human life as in the rest of nature, change accumulates slowly and almost invisibly until it is made manifest in the sudden form of fledging out or thawing or leaf-fall." -- William Bridges



Just as summer has finally arrived in the Pacific Northwest and will now begin to shift toward autumn, change has been progressively accumulating at diamonds in the soul. In January, I announced my words for the year: refine and expand. Not knowing where they would lead (but nonetheless knowing them to be essential), I continued the ongoing journey of transformation by listening deeply to my personal calling.



As a young woman, I was steered toward a "practical and stable" career in accounting and away from my curiosity in psychology and sociology. I played by other people's rules, proceeded the best I could with limited self-awareness, and continually set aside the place deep in my heart that knew my life was meant for more than numbers and schedules.



At a time when my peers were "calling it good" and beginning to look toward retirement, I chose to pursue a fresh career and garnered my masters in counseling psychology. For the past several years my desire has been met (and continues to be) walking alongside others as they move toward their most authentic lives. In the spirit of refining and expanding, I have spent the past nine months immersed in further study of this passion and expertise. It has involved difficult choices, exciting risks and lots of hard work. It has been a wonderful time of fledging out and stepping more fully into my heart's desire.



The pull has been to gently shift my focus away from intensive psychotherapy (with it's roots in acutely understanding the past), and move toward more life coaching, writing and experience facilitation. For me, these disciplines incorporate our essential understanding of where we've been, bring focus to our current experience and allow personal dreams to begin manifesting now. My practice continues to incorporate spirituality, creativity, a profound respect for self-care and the understanding of human growth and development. My hope is to connect with others like myself who desire to discover and live life to their personal fullest. I hope you will consider joining me and stepping closer to your dreams today!



Diamonds in the Soul - helping high-functioning, under-living people recover and nourish personal delight & joy in life.

Pondering... 30 in 30 - Day 12

Generous Ants



There is an inspired line from a Billy Collins poem that speaks of devoted ants following him home from the woods one occasion. Sitting down with my own pen and paper, I began to ponder what had followed me home this day. It was a morning rife with unremarkable markedness. A glorious hike in the crisp morning air. Two stealth skunks crossing my path - their odorous aroma transmuting into flora. A sparkling sprinkler catching me delightfully by surprise. Engaging in the practice of getting lost and being found. Amazement and awe at the summer colors bursting and blooming. The ineffable beauty of compatriots surrounding me.



A stream of images continued with ramshackle headstones adorned in garish flowers - surreal and everlasting. Simple rocks formed into crosses, nearly invisible yet ever so present by the side of my path. A scar unveiled. Winged magpie. Parade of cooing rooftop pigeons. An unidentified flock swooping across the cotton-sprinkled azure sky.



While walking today heaven surrounded me through my senses, then followed me home like a trail of generous ants marching across the page.



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Diamonds in the Soul - helping high-functioning, under-living people uncover & maintain personal delight & joy in life.

Pondering... 30 in 30 - Day 4

Living on Retreat

One of my greatest joys in life is going on retreat - setting aside time in this busy life and unplugging from daily distractions and obligations. Upon returning from one luxurious week, a dear friend inquired as to how I re-enter life after being away. It's a provocative question and one I can only answer for myself. I imagine others may ponder this same thought. I've consistently noticed that few people choose to take time for themselves and even fewer know how to integrate the gift once they return. Some find it impossible and others don't even try. Wouldn't it be wonderful to engage in a life where each day felt as comfortable as a retreat?

Staying on retreat, like most valuable things in life, is a practice. It's not unlike engaging in studies at school or learning to stay on the yoga mat. It can be likened to running a marathon and training with never-ending miles on the road. Have you ever seen the face of someone who's just finished a 26.2 mile race? While their body may be aching with sore joints and blistered feet, the sense of accomplishment, joy and well-being resonates around them as the exhilaration far outweighs the pain. Similarly, the practice of daily retreat can magnify ongoing happiness and nurture satisfied longevity.

As my friend asked the question, "how do you re-enter," I quickly heard my answer, "I actually live on retreat." My life is filled with delight of my own making and all I have to do is remember that. Does it mean life is easy? Heck no! I still have laundry to do, groceries to buy and relationships to navigate, but even as I write those words, I realize and notice how grateful I am to have clothes to wash, food to buy, and people to love. As I remember the idea that life is my retreat, the notion of how to re-enter gently drifts away.

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Diamonds in the Soul - helping high-functioning, under-living people uncover & maintain personal delight & joy in life.

Caught between Tangible & Intangible

Today’s Lenten questions:
“What are the things you feel pulled between in your own life?”
“How are you being called to a greater experience of wholeness and integration?”

Isn’t that our greatest movement – the steps that propel us toward wholeness and integration? Living a life of integrity and not lies. The pull of life on the grand scale between love and fear. How will I step into the places of love? Where will fear seek to overcome my integrity?

In my recent post, a commenter asked what areas of growth I thought the robin’s song was signaling – spiritual, professional or relational? My response was that it feels like they’re all nestled together. My spirituality encircles everything I do and my professional life is all about relationship. I feel pulled or torn between being a go-with-the-flow, follow-my-heart, don’t-worry-about-time–or-money kind of woman and the get-‘er-done, make-a-list, be-productive, earn-a-living while tangibly-using-my-gifts messages that run through my mind. I am caught between the tangible and intangible.

Tangible output receives praise, financial reward, acknowledgement and results in physical product. This approach glorifies product over process. Process (or the intangible) comes from the times I sit curled on my sofa with music playing and candle lit simply allowing myself to be. Ineffable moments not limited by time or space. It is 'output' that can’t be quantified (nor should it be). Yet even this sacred time can be subjected to productivity results if I judge the quality by how many pages I pen or the number of minutes my meditation lasts. The challenge for me is to simply BE(E).

While in Egypt last fall, I received the word Be(e) during a very special ritual. It is proving to be quite a powerful presence for me. Bees are longtime symbols for accomplishing the impossible. The bee is a perfect totem for this place of being caught between tangible and intangible, product over process, because in reality both are necessary to achieve the balance my heart desires.

Be. It all comes back to this for me. Greater wholeness and integration calls me to this place where tangible and intangible meet and dissolve into one. Where product and process find their perfect balance. Where prayer becomes a way of being and being becomes a way of prayer.

Will you ponder today’s questions alongside me?