Hummingbird

Keeping our eyes open to the miracles of the world. Somewhere in my history the message was instilled that it was “playing with fire” to consider any interpretation of life outside of the Bible. If this is true, I have to wonder why all these other people, places and things were put on earth (i.e. created) if we aren’t supposed to pay attention to them.

That’s a long intro to say that hummingbirds have been showing up on my path and I think they are trying to tell me something. Some of you may recall that in the winter, dolphins became a symbol for me and reminded me to focus more on breath and movement.

Lately, I have been wrestling a bit with other topics. While I am a full believer that life is a journey to be lived rather than endured, some days the realities of life (pain, teenagers, people with all the answers) send me running for the covers. I am also a proponent of taking the time to rest, quit processing and let things just be for awhile, but realize that sometimes it can get a little too comfy down there under the “woes me” blanket and I need a reminder to ease off the covers.

Enter the hummingbird ☺. I have always been fascinated by these lovely creatures and recently they have been popping up everywhere—always at someone else’s home. Yesterday, however, I stood at my kitchen window and watched a hummingbird enjoying my garden. It was the first time I ever saw one in my own yard. I was spellbound.

This morning when I awoke, I thought “wouldn’t it be nice to just focus on the hummingbird today instead of all the other things?” And so after journaling I decided to look up the hummingbird in “Animal Speak.”

Did you know? (The following are quotes.)

• The hummingbird reminds us to find joy in what we do and to sing it out.
• It reminds us that if we truly enjoy what we are doing, we become light as a feather, and life is rich with nectar.
• The hummingbird can help you to find joy and sweetness in any situation. Its swiftness is always a reminder to grab joy while you can—as quickly as you can.
• The hummingbird is a symbol for accomplishing that which seems impossible. It will teach you how to find the miracle of joyful living from your own life circumstances.

Wonderful and rich reminders from such a little creature. And, so I start this day with the blessing of the hummingbird--in my humble opinion, one of God’s great creatures in a teeny tiny package.

Playing with fire? Hmmm. Maybe, but it feels like a risk worth taking!

photo from google images

Art is an Act of the Soul

“The ego has the power to keep us from making art, but it does not really have the power to make art itself. Art is an act of the soul.” Julia Cameron

My ego tells me not to write.

“You suck at writing. No one reads it anyway or if they do they don’t like it.”

But they keep coming back.

“Maybe. Who knows? You are like the one hit wonders of the 60’s and 70’s. You get a little piece here or there that someone likes, but you can’t really write. You have nothing original to say. Give it up. Fold up the blog. Post a few pictures (someone else’s pictures). Creativity? Give up that stuff. It doesn’t pay. It’s just a hobby anyway. You can write for fun but no one wants to read it. Others have said it all before and what’s so special about you?”

No. Wait. I am special. My art is a gift. A gift I give to myself. I can write for me. I love to write. I love the surprises. I find myself with words and peel away the layers as I write.

Lucy lives. Lucy inspires. Lucy creates. Art comes from the heart. My heart. My heart that is filled with joy. My cup overflows and I choose to give out of that abundance each day. Sometimes it is in the written word. Other days it is in relationship or subtle ways I cannot know.

I choose to give in words, deed and action. My lovely garden. A smile to a stranger. A random act of kindness. And, yes, Ms. Ego, I give with my writing.

It is an act of courage each day to turn down the ego and listen to the heart! Let's go for it!!!

I Choose Life

Words from my journal--June, 2005:

I would love to spend another night out here and I realize/I KNOW that it would not be the same without the day. We need both--the bitter and the sweet (the dark and the light). When we have gone to hell and seen it, felt it, lived it--life is much sweeter just as the night's cool and calm contrasts to the heat and chaos of the day. Both/And. The whole package.

They will come in gradations but we need both. The fears will keep me running and reaching for life, lest I ever take life for granted. The bitter and the sweet. The swing of the pendulum. I may never know how far it needs to go to the dark side and often I don't have a choice especially where circumstances are out of my control. But, I can choose for myself how and where I go.

Will I covet and grovel in the pain and fear and anger and self-pity, etc. as I did yesterday? Or will I patiently wait and trust that the cool of the night will come? The heat is turning up as the sun is rising. How will I choose to stay cool?

I Choose Life!

Jesus in Three Lines

Today I was presented with an interesting challenge. I was asked to share my “belief in and relationship with Jesus Christ” in the space of 2 ½ handwritten lines. Lucy really started to rebel and wanted to be quite flip about the whole thing, but seeing as how it was for a high school admissions application for my daughter I decided that “flip” might not be prudent.

So, I did what most normal people would do…I avoided the task. I procrastinated. I did a little journaling, read a few Bible verses and decided I was nearing a reasonable response when my beautiful friend, Lisa called. She and I share much in common with our faith having both grown up in pretty conservative circles and now as we have matured, we each find that simplicity is really what resonates most with us. I posed my predicament to Lisa and she quite simply responded, “When I am faced with describing Jesus I always fall back to unconditional love, acceptance and forgiveness.” Beautiful. Simple. Right on as far as Lisa and I are concerned.

After we hung up I went back to the dreaded form, considered Lisa’s words and my own ponderings and this is what I submitted:

“My relationship with Christ is everlasting, ever-changing and ever-seeking. When I describe Jesus, the words unconditional love, acceptance and forgiveness are foremost in my heart and actions.”

Three lines. Simple. Pure. True. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could see and experience God and life this simply?

Thanks Lisa!

photo - Lisa at Sunrise

the words will not come

the words will not come.
they do not flow like water.
they drip in my mind interrupting solace like a leaky faucet.
they come in ragged, jagged fits and bursts and then
they resist—stop—refuse to congeal and thus
leave me wanting—yearning—aching and unsure of what needs
or wants to be said or heard or read.

my words are insufficient.
cards held close to my vest.
“Thank you but your words are not right for us.”
“Have you tried this or that?”
words of advice slip through the air
and hang like graffiti on a wall.

needing words to communicate—to feel complete.
finding words get in the way.
interpretation.
collision.
mood and mystery.
is there meaning in this text?
mine or yours?

the inner (& sometimes outer) critic speaks.
softly.
loudly.
in fits and spurts.
in screams and sighs.
the words will not come.
And they will not stop.

photo by bill h