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live it to give it is all about love and connection. Being authentic. Living our lives and sharing it with others. Life is messy and so is this blog. Somedays my organized coach self shows up. Other days it's my vulnerable author. There's a mom that lives inside me alongside a wife, friend, social justice activist, creative muse, ponderer extraordinaire, and multitude of others. I'll introduce you to people who inspire me and offer a peek into my world that very likely intersects with your world. In other words, I will share life in its full, glorious mess with you. I'm honored you're here and I hope you'll come back soon!!  Cheers! Kayce 

 

Entries in Letting Go (32)

Thursday
Sep202012

The Universe Shows Off

Sometimes the Universe (aka God) is a gigantic flashy show-off pulling tricks out of her hat like a magician with fluffy bunnies. If I began to try and articulate all of the brilliance that’s shown up in my recent days (alongside some downright phantasmagorical stuff), it might read more like fiction than fact... but then again the grit of life is often stranger than make believe, you know?

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Tuesday
Jul172012

Breaking the Chains...

This summer I was invited to serve on a panel designed to assist participants in understanding the dynamics of letting go of a fundamentalist background. My participation was predicated on my personal history of transforming my own rigid religious and familial upbringing into a fluid, joy-filled life. What follows is a metaphor (and more).

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Thursday
May242012

Two Seals and a Gift


Bandon, OR Beach
Nature offers an amazing gift of bringing us back to center when life feels out of balance. One of my favorite ways to explore just about anything is through the use of metaphor. How is this like that? While visiting the Oregon coast, my questions emerged something like this: How is the baby seal who strives to climb atop a slippery rock like my current situation? How is the beach covered in fog similar to my brain that refuses to clear? What of the sun that remains concealed from sight? Are my dreams hiding in plain view or are they just over the horizon?

One evening while beach combing, I paused to watch a group of sea lions gathered in the swelling tide. Eyes trained on the youngest pup, I was mesmerized by his struggle to climb atop the slippery embankment where his mother perched precariously. My maternal instincts were tugged by his unfruitful tenacity, and part of me wanted to wade into the icy surf and boost him onto the oblong pillar. Fortunately my sanity prevailed. After all, if he, an able-bodied water creature, couldn’t do it on his own, what benefit would I, a moderate swimmer at best, be to him? Nonetheless, our natural instincts are often to reach toward those we momentarily consider less capable—children, clients, co-workers, strangers—while setting aside our own care and safety in the midst.

Baby Reaches Mama (momentarily)
As I continued to observe the scene before me, I focused on the mother who lay upon the craggy peak—her pose precarious, like a crescent moon tilted on its side and loosely balanced on a rocking pebble. She appeared neither concerned about her shaky state or that of her offspring diligently attempting to reach her. Occasionally, she raised her head to look around, but then lay back to rest. She wisely knew the rhythm of the tide would ultimately ease her off the rock and into the water, reuniting her and her babe.

Recalling this scene later, I asked the questions: How is this like my calling today? Will I clear my head enough to look around and inquire: What do I need? What next? What will bring me life, rest, joy, peace, and love? Even though my initial response was to rescue the striving pup, my deep resonance was not with him... I have done enough striving for a lifetime. Today I choose to wonder how I can rise up like the wizened matriarch, peer around, and allow the flow of life to gently carry me into the sea and off my own precarious perch.

My assessment is not that the mother sea lion is resigned to her existence, but rather she has learned the rhythms of her life and chooses to go with them rather than struggle against the raging tides. Her young pup expends his energy in his own natural (and necessary) process of maturation. Each are appropriate for their time and stage in life.

Curious!
Today I invite you to consider this: Where do you struggle and strain when letting go might serve you better? What energy needs to be expended to bring your life (mind, spirit, body) into balance or maturation? How is this like that? Where might nature guide you today?

Wednesday
Apr252012

It Takes a Village


The Coffee House on Cherry Street, Tulsa Oklahoma (Feb '12)
Have you ever launched a personal aspiration out into the world? Or embarked upon something you’d planned for a lengthy period of time (a dream vacation, college selection, or committed relationship)? From personal experience, I’ve found it’s a lot like sending a child off to their first day of school or standing on the edge of a minuscule airplane platform preparing to fling yourself into the great unknown. You’ve prepared as best you can—read all the books, packed the lunch (or parachute or suitcase), gathered support from friends and family—and now it’s time to let go and see what happens. Such has been my experience over the last few months as I released my innermost reflections and introduced As I Lay Pondering: daily invitations to live a transformed life into the world.

Officially published on January 25, 2012, “Pondering” has made its way into over 350 homes around the world—including Australia, England, Canada, Hawaii, Alaska, and Florida. It’s a highly respectable sales number for a first-time, self-published book, but... hey, I have more friends than that on Facebook and this is my baby I’ve sent off to school which means I want the greatest success possible. Now to be perfectly clear, my definition of success is not by numbers. It’s about reaching people who may be touched, inspired, or personally challenged and transformed by its message. My belief is that “Pondering” is a life-giving book. While I know it’s not for everyone, I also trust there are way more than 350 people out there who will resonate from this message.

"Like Mark Nepo and Rachel Naomi Remen, Kayce invites us to learn with her day by day as she creates a handmade life. Her stories enlighten while her prompts tickle the heart's ear to listen with more clarity and self-kindness. A beautiful way to spend a few minutes each day." Jennifer Louden, best-selling author and teacher 


Book signing, Walla Walla, WA (Apr '12)
The foremost question people ask me these days is “what’s next?” My answer? Who knows!?! But in this moment, I am sharing these few thoughts. Perhaps you’ve been considering buying your own book. Fabulous! Today is a great day to do it. Maybe there’s someone in your life who could use a little encouragement and hope each day. As I Lay Pondering makes a beautiful gift! Think about it. Are you ready to embark on your own dream and would welcome some encouragement? Yes? Go for it! I’m here to cheer you on.

The term “it takes a village” has always resonated with me and now more so than ever. One way I see it manifesting is in how we help each other nurture our dreams, thus growing stronger villages in the world. Today, I’m sharing my ongoing dream with you. I hope you’ll consider being a part of my village in whatever way resonates for you. Send me a note... buy a book... pass along this message... say a prayer... invite me to your town/blog/interview/favorite bookstore... the possibilities are really endless once we start dreaming together!

And, please don’t forget to let me know how I can help nurture your dreams! Collaboration? Shall we? Remember... it takes a village!

As I Lay Pondering: daily invitations to live a transformed life by Kayce S. Hughlett Available here and at Amazon.com

Thursday
Jan262012

Changing the World

"When we work at solving our own problems, we've already made a contribution to solving the problems around us." Adrienne Howley, The Naked Buddha

Never underestimate your personal power to change the world. I sit here today wrapped in the wonder and awe of seemingly inconsequential acts and moments that—taken alone—might appear to have no impact in the world. I'm talking about random happenings... acts offered in kindness and received in silence.

As I was writing my new book, there were days when I wondered what the heck am I doing? Is it all worth it? Is this self-serving? Why go through the agony and potential embarrassment of putting myself out into the world? I went through a similar process in my early blogging phase when I was so obsessed with readership and comments that I nearly went apoplectic with the highs and lows of others responses. Ultimately, I decided to turn off my stat counters and return to the core of why I was writing.

Both with the book and the blog, my mantra for moving forward was often: If this impacts even one person for good, then it is all worth it. Many days I broke it down so small that I was the one person to be impacted... With the blog there were dry periods when writing was slow and other times when it seemed too raw and private to print. Nevertheless, I kept plodding away. In recent months as I've pondered my online presence, I've considered whether or not to combine my "diamonds:" this one ("in the sky") and "diamonds in the soul" where I play for pay. Critics and marketing gurus say we should have a brand or a look that people associate with us. Their wisdom might also pose that having a blog still operating with a "blogspot" address (i.e. not customized) is the kiss of death. Again, I ask: Why am I writing and who is it for? Bottom line - I write to discover what I know, and this forum has been the place where I continue growing in my knowing. "lucy" gave me back my voice and allowed me space to ponder to my heart's content without the pressure of "being professional" or following a neatly designed brand. That is one reason why lucy is staying right here.

The 2nd reason circles back to my original statement: Never underestimate your power to change the world. This morning, a longtime reader (and sometime commenter) revealed to me that this blog had been a catalyst in moving him toward a life-changing experience. This blog. Right here, folks. My girl, lucy. I am amazed, inspired and grateful for that revelation. It helped me remember that no act (or blog) is too small (or uncool) to manifest goodness. My goal continues to be toward my own personal growth and discovery... and if it happens to catch someone else in the process, Wow!... that's something to celebrate! I am abundantly grateful he shared. I am wildly delighted to be here. I am enchanted with this Universe that brings together random people and shifts small acts of authenticity toward magnificent goodness.

Today: How will you be the change you wish to see in the world? Perhaps one small act at a time? What if you believed that everything is connected and nothing is wasted? I do.


As I Lay Pondering: daily invitations to live a transformed life by Kayce S. Hughlett. Available here.

photos ©h3images.com (ruby beach, 12/30/11)